My friend Jake is a well-known and respected man in Austin, TX. Ours has been a long-standing friendship, tested by college nights littered with up-til-dawn parties and bleary-eyed Sunday mornings.
No matter how fond you are of a person, when they appear in your dreams you have to evaluate what their illusory presence meant. I’ve always admired my friend Jake because he’s smart and cool and friendly, but my mind may have taken things a bit too far.
I’ll let you be the judge.
Supermodels Love Him: Dream Jake
Written to Jake upon waking Tuesday, June 24, 2014:
“You were a part of a dream I had early this morning.
I went to your house party where everyone was required to wear costumes. I don’t watch baseball, let alone give two poops about the Boston Red Sox, but I was wearing the team hat. You had a Yorkshire Terrier (goodness knows why), which you loved dearly and forced me to give up my hat for… I was kinda sore about that.
Then, the party ended around daybreak… I couldn’t find you in your house.
A score of young people materialized and said, “Oh, Jake? Yeah, he’s over at [blah blah blah] restaurant.”
I followed the directions they gave me, found you holding that damned Yorkie, laughing and having brunch with supermodels – not surprising.
I was all like, “Hey, man! Can I have that hat back?” and then you turned into Ryan Gosling and said, “Ha ha, G! You’re so silly.”
We left the restaurant with your supermodel girlfriends and you were still Ryan Gosling. I was laughing hysterically at how much of a wizard you were, disguising yourself so cleverly… as which celebrity (the “Jake” or the “Ryan”) I may never know.
So, thanks for being playing a major role in my dream. It was very entertaining.”
Jake is Ryan
You may have seen him around Austin, TX but you had no idea that those Ryan Gosling “sightings” were actually Dream Jake using his skilled sorcery against you. The illusion is powerful. Now I have to tell my mom that my friend Jake is a warlock posing as a celebrity during the day… she’s going to commit me.